Being invited to speak is a beginning. What happens next tells us whether our participation matters.
“Darling, I’ve spent enough time proving I belong in the room. In this era, my presence has a purpose.”
— Sheena Millette, Founder of InHer Era
You leave the huddle and replay it in your head.
You offered an idea. Raised a concern. Suggested a different way of doing something because you could see a gap that needed attention.
Your leader nodded. Someone said, “Good point.”
And then? You’re ghosted. Wondering where your contribution went.
No follow-up. No explanation. No indication that your contribution informed a decision, prompted another question or even made it beyond that moment.
I mean, GURL! A nod is lovely. I appreciate an attentive face. But I need to know whether what I contributed had somewhere to go.
Because after a while, you start wondering whether you were invited to help shape the work—or simply to be present while it happened.
There is a difference between being heard and being engaged
I do not expect every idea I offer to become the final decision.
Sometimes an idea needs more work. Sometimes there are constraints I cannot see. Sometimes another approach makes more sense.
We’re reasonable people, you and me. We can work with that.
What matters is whether a leader engages with what was brought forward.
“That raises a concern we need to look into.”
“We cannot move ahead with this right now, and here is why.”
“There is something useful here. Can you develop this part?”
Those responses give us something to work with. We understand what happened to our contribution and what we might do next.
Even when our suggestion does not make the final cut, acknowledging it and explaining the decision can help us grow. It tells us that someone has taken our thinking seriously enough to respond to it.
That is a very different experience from watching an idea disappear into a room full of agreeable faces.
A leader once helped me see what I could not yet see
Have you ever put real effort into something, felt sure you were doing it well, and then received feedback that changed how you approached it?
I have.
Earlier in my career, that something was my documentation.
Every detail was going in.
I thought I was being thorough. Observant. Giving the kind of context that would make someone read my notes and think, She has this covered.
In my mind, I was killing it.
Then a supervisor reviewed my work and helped me see something: some of what I recorded reflected my interpretation of an interaction rather than what I actually observed.
She taught me to return to what I could see and hear.
A child ran to their parent.
A child shouted.
What happened? What was said? What could I describe without assigning an intention or meaning I could not verify?
That feedback stayed with me because she showed me where my judgment needed sharpening and gave me a practical way to improve it.
My effort had somewhere to go.
I left with a clearer understanding of the work and a skill I could carry into the next situation.
That is coaching. And that is leadership in motion.
What happens after the huddle matters
It is easy to ask, “Any thoughts?”
The more revealing moment comes after someone answers.
Especially when the answer complicates the plan.
When someone identifies a gap nobody has accounted for. When they ask a question that slows the conversation down. When their experience challenges an assumption the room has already accepted.
How a leader responds in that moment tells people something about the invitation.
Was there room to influence the direction? Was there room to ask a difficult question? Will raising a concern lead to a useful conversation—or an uncomfortable reputation?
People notice.
They notice which suggestions receive follow-up. They notice whose questions are welcomed. They notice when a concern returns weeks later as a problem, even though someone had already raised it.
Over time, those experiences influence what they choose to bring forward.
A woman who once arrived with ideas may begin editing herself before she speaks. She may offer the safer observation. Save the question for later. Decide that explaining what she sees will take more energy than she has available that day.
Her silence can look like agreement from the front of the room.
There may be a much longer story behind it.
Leaders can give contributions somewhere to go
A leader cannot act on everything. But a leader can help people understand what happens next.
That might mean acknowledging the specific issue someone raised, rather than offering a general “thanks for sharing.”
It might mean explaining a constraint so the person can refine their suggestion with better information.
It might mean returning to the team and saying, “We reviewed the concern raised in our last huddle. Here is what we found, and here is what we are changing.”
And sometimes, as my supervisor showed me, it means coaching someone through the part of their contribution that needs development.
These are practical ways to build trust. They make participation useful to the work and useful to the person doing it.
They also give a leader a better view of the team. You learn how people think, where they need support and what they are noticing from their position in the organization.
There is valuable information in that exchange—if you stay with it long enough.
To the woman wondering whether she should keep speaking
It can be discouraging to care about the work and feel unsure whether your contribution is reaching anyone.
You may find yourself reviewing your tone, your timing and your choice of words, trying to work out what would make the difference.
There is room to develop how you communicate. We all have that work to do. There is also a leadership responsibility to respond with enough clarity that you are not left guessing indefinitely.
A useful question to ask is:
“Can we clarify what the next step is for the point I raised?”
You might learn that it needs more detail, that someone is reviewing it or that a decision has already been made. Whatever the answer, you have asked for the information you need to decide where to put your effort next.
You don’t have to wait for someone else to name your value
Following up matters. So does keeping your own record.
What gap did you identify? What did you recommend? What did you help clarify, improve or prevent?
Document it, even when your idea doesn’t become the final decision. Be clear about what you contributed, what happened next and any results you can demonstrate.
Because when it’s time for a performance conversation, an interview or your next opportunity, you deserve more than, “I know I worked hard.”
You need receipts, darling. Specifics look good on you!
Because we are not arriving at our next chapter trying to remember all the ways we made a difference.
This is part of why I created the InHer Era Career Positioning Toolkit: https://www.inherera.ca/shop/p/career-positioning-toolkit to help you capture your accomplishments, recognize your transferable skills and put language to the experience you bring.
That is positioning. You begin to connect what you’ve done with what you’re ready to do next—and give others the evidence to understand it.
When you’re clear on your positioning, every part of how you present yourself can speak to your value: your résumé, your LinkedIn profile, your examples and the opportunities you pursue.
A leader’s acknowledgement matters. Your contribution also deserves a place in your own career story.
The nod is lovely. But at your next career move, bring more than their applause. Bring your receipts.
